You believe you got a set of matched luggage if you have two shopping bags from the same store.

You think a stock tip is advice on worming' your hogs.

You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.

Your state's got a new law that says when a couple get divorced, they are still legally brother and sister.

You got stopped by a state trooper. He asked you if you had an I.D. and you said, 'Bout What?'

You think Genitalia is an Italian airline

Your sister is the third generation of women in your family to conceive a baby as a result of an alien abduction.

If you can burp and say your name at the same time, you're shur'nuff a redneck.

You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off it's wheels.