A sailor and a pirate are drinking at a waterfront bar and they
proceed to swap sea stories. The sailor notes the pirate's peg
leg, eye patch and hook.

"So tell me," asks the sailor, "how did you come to lose that
leg?"

"Arrgh," says the pirate, "'Twas a black squall swept me
overboard. Whilst in the water, a shark snapped me leg off and
I've had this peg leg ever since."

"Wow!" says the sailor. "And how'd you get the hook?"

"We was fighting at close quarters," says the pirate. "Some scurvy
dog with a cutlass hacked me hand off and I've had this hook ever
since."

"Amazing!" says the sailor. "And what about the eye patch?"

"Arrgh," says the pirate. "'Twas a seagull pooped in me eye."

"A seagull?" asks the sailor, a bit incredulous.

"Well, I should explain," says the pirate. "'Twas me first day
with the new hook."